Sunday, October 26, 2008

You know you are a Missionary when...

It's interesting how things have become the "norm" around here - things that would have seemed strange, if not unusual just 2 years ago. Here are some examples:

1. You have to throw your TP in the trash can - not the toilet.
2. You have NO IDEA what the latest movies are.
3. When your life revolves around the efficiency of your ceiling fans.
4. When blogging becomes second nature.
5. When English is no longer the primary language.
6. When an iPhone seems as foreign as the language you speak everyday.
7. When your mail life revolves around when your next care package arrives.
8. When local schools are canceled for a "rain day" (not a snow day).
9. When honking is a sign of "hello" rather than the middle finger.
10. When you "see" your friends on Skype, not in person.
11. Your clothing fashion is WAY out of date.
12. When your milk comes in a box and your mayo in a bag.
13. When your daily news includes what the current exchange rate is.
14. Where your shopping includes daily trips to the farmers market.
15. When household pets include scorpions, millipedes, tarantulas, geckos, ants and mosquitos.
16. When the question, "where is your home" becomes confusing to answer.
17. When you stop feeling uncomfortable when you have a conversation with a mom who is breastfeeding.
18. When you are excited that the grocery store is carrying SPAM.
19. 011 is a familiar code.
20. When you are okay with the bugs in your house because "that one doesn't bite"
21. When you watch a National Geographic special and you recognize where they are at.
22. When you are outraged that the dinner you just ate cost more than $4.00
23. You don't think it strange to cut your grass with a machete.
24. When you forget the date of the Super Bowl, but you know when the local soccer team plays.
25. When stopping for pigs or cows to cross the street doesn't seem strange.
26. When you go to the U.S. and you "can't drink the water"
27. You are grateful for the speed and efficiency of the U.S. Postal Service.
28. When you realize that traffic signs and lights are only recommendations.
29. You can order a beer at the movie theater.
30. When you sweat on Christmas day.
31. When you have to order additional pages for your passport.
32. When you stop wondering what kind of meat is in the stew (nor do you really want to know).
33. When you have carried the same dollar bill in your wallet for 2 years.
34. When you think you should own stock in hand sanitizer.
35. When you measure distances in how long it takes to walk there.
36. Size "large" is no size large you have ever seen (even my girl can't wear them).
37. You have friends on every continent.
38. Most of your friends view dental hygiene as a luxury.
39. You have a propane gas stove around the house just in case.
40. Where your seasons are hot, or hot and wet.
41. Horse grazing is the normal mode for cutting grass.
42. There's no local park, only the jungle.
43. The nearest ancient ruin is closer than the closest McDonalds.
44. Your fish is served with the head still attached - and you are expected to eat it.
45. Where no one has a bathtub, a dishwasher, or a coffee bean grinder.
46. Local tourist attractions include jungle hikes, zip lining, and waterfall slides.
47. When a nice short church service is only 2 1/2 hours long.
48. When you have to go to 5 different stores to get school supplies.
49. When you pay your electric bill at the supermarket, and pick up your health form at the bank.
50. When none of the above seems strange anymore.


Lori said...

Oh my gosh - that was too funny and too real! Could relate to most of it and will have to come up with a Zim version! Thanks for sharing - hope all is well!


Pamela said...

Haha! Love it...too funny and too true :)

Lucy said...

Sean here:

Big fan of 12, 21, 29, 37, 45

Don't understand 26

And can you really do 31?

Ellie said...

And -
You know you are a missionary when you do medical work in your living room, and people walk around unconcerned!

I used to have to have IVs every few weeks - well, not a problem since the stuff was readily available, and I knew how to hook it up. I can give myself an IM without problems, but not an IV. Convinced a former lab tech that she could get the needle in, despite her loud protest that she doesn't start IVs, and hooked the rest up myself with the help of some duct tape (improvise!) and some baby rings hung from the ceiling fan! Hey, it worked!

Would be fun to have a blog of the funniest ways of obtaining medical treatments and in the strangest places on the field.

And -
when you are shocked at the idea of patient privacy.

I had asked a doctor in our SS class in the States about something, and later chatting with his wife, I said,"Oh, but you must have heard about that from your husband." No. Confidentiality rules...

oh, those things!... out there, medical issues were addressed after prayer meeting since that is when everyone was there, and the doctor had his bag. This was before telephones were common, so prayer meeting was the one chance you had. Medical things were therefore a group event. Privacy? What is that?

Oh, the things I learned about as a kid!